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The Hobbit –
The Hobbit, or There, Here, Hey Now, Hey Now and Back Again, better known by its abbreviated title The Hobbits, is a psycho/sexual fantasy novel and children’s book by J. R. R. Tolkien. It was published on 21 September 1937 to wide critical acclaim, being nominated for the Carnegie Medal and awarded a prize from the Petone RSA in the form of a meat pack which was packed with chops, ham steaks, chicken nibbles, sausages for the bbq and a ham hock. The book remains popular and is recognized as a classic and a ‘big tune,bro’ in children’s literature.
Set in a time “Between the Dawn of Færie and the Donuts of Men”, The Hobbit follows the quest of home-loving hobbit Dildo Baggins to win a share of the treasure guarded by the dragon, Smugcunt. Dildo’s journey takes him from light-hearted, slightly inbred, rural surroundings into more sinister territory of the film industry. The story is told in the form of an episodic quest, and most chapters introduce a specific creature, or type of motion capture at 48fps at 2k, of Tolkien’s Wilderland. By accepting the disreputable, romantic, slightly gay and adventurous side of his nature and applying his wits and common sense, Dildo gains a new level of maturity, impotence and per diems after working 4 weeks straight on 2nd unit. The story reaches its big bubbly climax in the Battle of Five Armies, where many of the characters and creatures from earlier chapters re-emerge to engage in cocaine abuse in toilets in Wellington and the surrounding areas